i have a sense that there is a conspiracy against family (all sorts) in the usa. i have been living in san francisco of california for almost 6 years and my observations are based on this as well as all the stereotypes and tv i grew up with from 1975 to this date. growing up in amman there was always an image of usa families as broken, as hostile, as really bad for you: 1) families are broken in the usa, 2) parents kick their children out of the family home on their 18th birthday--the candles still warm, 3) parents never help their children after they are 18, 4) children hate their parents and have an especially dreadful relationship with their mothers. this was only confirmed with further tv and mainstream psychoanalysis as well as the depiction of the adult as independent of their family and is only loyal to the immediate family of spouse and children. Well, that is until a divorce happens and then they have the spouse is included in the hate of the immediate ancestry. There is never any mention of ancestry beyond immediate parents and a kind mention of grandparents (removed and far). THEN i lived in the usa and met real people who are from the usa, born and grew up in usa and not just on tv, and they have families, very much like the ones i know from amman. they have a variety of childhood stories, a reasonable share of happiness and drama, a reasonable representation of a spectrum of families (divorced, close grandparents, aunties playing central roles, sibling turned parent, etc) and their troubles (alcoholism, divorce, molestation, violence, etc) many have lived with their parents until way beyond 18, some left when they were 18, some went back at some point even in their forties, some take the kids to their parents to baby sit, some get angry, some plan birthdays, whatever, a real support system that is both beautiful and terrific--NORMAL (as much as a 20th century nuclear family can be normal which is not much in my opinion, crisis seriously however, that is a different yet connected thought).
my analysis is that there is a conspiracy against the family structure as well as an appreciation of a community for love and support and well-being in favor of a nuclear family that can easily travel in search of work and can easily be dependent on parents' exploitation by the work-market. the big car and the loans need this isolation. capitalism in the usa model needs isolation. visa card is your best friend, shopping is your best friend, loans are symbols of success, the job is what matters most.
and that makes people lonely. i think this stereotype is true.
